Geordies are Awesome

So I'm moved in to the new house now and all is pretty well. There's only a couple of things lacking, i.e. internet and bill payments. Everyone is pretty cool in and around the abode: seems like the whole street is inhabited by nice people. Even my student loan is being sorted at last. Turns out someone thought it was groovy to put important and official-looking documents that weren't theirs into a cupboard under the stairs without telling me... Could be sitting on a grand or two now and living it up a bit more, but I'm content with what I got. I'm reet lucky and reet happy, so I ain't complaining or nothing.

Couldn't be happier with the local we have on Wigan Road. Pool, darts, quiz, cheap drinks, ok toilets, toasties and more, all at The Roper's Arms. It's definitely my kinda pub!

Beeeeeard

Mmm... Was reading back through some of me older posts and saw a picture of me beard. It's been about 3 months since I shaved off my scratty student beard - mostly motivated by work's asking - and that was the end of it, as far as I was concerned. The ladies don't like it, for one thing. I get loads more attention without it, even more hugs 'n' kissin'. Now it's gone, though, people want it back.

I say 'people,' I mean two or three of my friends... but still. When it was there, no-one cared so much and now folk are missing it. Looking back at th'aforementioned picture, though, I think I might be missing it too... This is a definite beard quandry...

Something else that occurred to me whilst I looked upon my old blogs; I aint done my 'Song That I Can't Get Out of My Head' or 'Interesting Word' segment for ages. The song what's rattlin' around the confines of my thick skull is 'Mother' by none other than John Lennon. Wow, such raw emotion... Chills me to the bone. Today's word, to put you out of your misery, is 'substantial' because as a word, it actually is substantial. It's quite big and has a nice meatiness to it when you say it. Sub-stan-shul. Lovely!

Balls Out (ish...)

Here's some writing I've done - a poem - I'm finally sharing some with you. It rhymes, which isn't the most creative device, and it's not great, so to make it all better I'm gonna call it a kid's poem... That'll make its shortfalls ok, right? Here it is, a KID'S poem:

The Spider

Above my head
The spider crept,
And ate his prey
As I slept.

I woke up
To watch him there,
When he suddenly
Fell in my hair!

Shoo spider! Shoo spider!
I don't want you here,
Crawling and a stalking round
I'm shivering with fear!

Calmly as I could, I tried
To remove the little beast
Then he zipped back up, to his web,
And finished off his feast.

***FIN***
There you go... Hooray...

Ooh I'm All Wet

Yeah, anyway, enough about my private life...

So I've been trying to reach deep and meaningful conclusions on the front of art, with obvious particular reference to writing. Every writer, at some point, comes across this thing called 'the internal censor' which, as I understand it, is that berkish thing in your head saying. "Nah, mate, that's no good that. It sounds shit and boring, that."

The internal censor, though, has two 'weak points.' Other people say they like your stuff. Maybe they're lying, but they got no reason to so you make your own mind up there. The other weakness is the fact that you've read worse stuff (in your opinion) that's been published fine. So why do we listen to Mr/Mrs. Censor? No idea, love, no idea.

You can be reading Sylvia Plath one minute and then one in a series of the Star Wars novels (lol, don't judge me too harshly! The one I read was by Timothy Zahn, Heir to the Empire to be precise). One's like rubbing your eyeballs with the finest silk and producing the aurora borealis in your imagination. The other one is far from out of date faeces in your eyes producing rotting matter in your brain and you still enjoy it, so as long as you enjoy em both, one aint really better than the other, right?

It's upshot time, and I aint sure what to put... 'Just write' would be a good start, your effort has its own merits whatever the hell it is. Maybe I'll have the actual balls to put some more writing up next time, who knows!?! Now it's probs time to towel off...

Matty

Guess who's coming to my house tonight?










Jess "Rice Pisspy" West






And Matty! With others...
Consider yourself well and truly mentioned.

Deep South

Just give us a few minutes, 'k? Like, a few days' worth...
Life is constantly changing so you don't need me at all.
Rely on yourself, but if you need help
I'll be there soon