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Showing posts with label Suarez. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Suarez. Show all posts

Thursday, 25 April 2013

Luis Suarez Greatest Hits Collection

New from Troubled World-Class Footballers Productions, the company that brought you such blockbusters as Zany Zidane's 'Nutters Paradise', Eric Cantona's 'Tie My Opposition Fan Down, Sport, That I May Unleash A Kangaroo Kick on His Posterior' and The Balotelli Boys' 'The Fireworks, Anti-Bullying, Failing to Put on a Bib, Silly Car Paintjobs, Chameleon HairJobs, Silly-Trickshots-Not-Coming-Off-With-Rapid-Substitution-In-America, Why Always Me? Album', 'Luis Suarez - Greatest Hits'.

  • The collection has all your favourites including:
  • Bite Me Baby One More Time
  • Put Your Hand on my Balls
  • I've Got a Lovely Bunch of Negritoes
  • Golden Boot, Pewter Face
  • Yellow Card (Is it Me You're Looking For?)
  • You've Lost That Respectable Feeling
  • What Could I Possibly Do Next?
  • Twat Out of Hell
  • Scarborough Fair
  • I'm Having an Off Day But Will Still Find the Back of the Net (12" Version)
And, who could forget
  • If I Could Cheat Back Time

Yes that's right, get ready for a big bloody Suarez fest, right in your ears! Be careful they don't get bitten off by Mr Suarez or his new buddy Mike Tyson. He's one of the world's best footballers and hi-jinkers, so lets forget the controversy and just focus on the good bits: his music.

RRP: Your soul.

Wednesday, 30 January 2013

A Decent-Sized Roller Coaster

Probably more like 'The Tornado' in Morecambe's [ex] Frontierland than the 'Pepsi Max' at Blackpool's Pleasure Beach but you get what you're given. As you all know from my constant whining, I don't get to see the football matches I want, or the amount I want (first world problems...), but tonight was rare in that I did get to see Liverpool play. Half of their game against Arsenal, but you get what you're given (HORSE).

I come into the pub just as the first half finishes. One - nil to us I see, Suarez has scored I see, 'excellent' I think. I get my drink and impatiently await the second half (seriously, waiting for it was almost as tense as my last blood test results, but I digress...). Seeing Hendo's goal was just magical. Sustained pressure from our lads, a bit of a lucky rebound but then the cool head to side-foot around an outstretched keeper and into the back of the net. Riding pretty damn high.

Then within seven or eight minutes we were drawing... It was kind of funny in a way, we've not being doing well against higher-table teams, and this was comedy by repetition. How could we throw that lead away?

Where oh where could Arsenal's first goal come from? A set piece? Absolutely! That was the funniest, they had two really ridiculous dives (one drawn from Lucas, the next from Agger). Neither had any contact, as replays showed, but at least one of them resulted in a yellow card for the dive, rather than the false offence (take that Giroud :P). But anyways, the first goal came from a free-kick. It wasn't an inspirational take by Giroud, but it was perfectly weighted and placed. Reina didn't have much of a chance, and all I say is fair play to Arsenal there, good fighting spirit.

Their next one... blimey... They seemed to be doing what we wanted to do but much better. That knock-around between midfield and front line, casual yet precise as you like, before our defenders are so confused a goal seems almost inevitable. A ball breaks out to Walcott (when's he going to be thirty, I wonder...) and from a pretty damn tight angle, he bends it around Reina. Past couple of years I've not been Reina's 'biggest fan'. He's making more errors and doing less of the basics correctly. This one, not to take anything away from a great strike by Walcott, I think Reina could have adjusted his feet a lot better (he had the time, he could have seen it coming) and should have stretched his arm out across the trajectory the ball took.

Brendan Rogers, our glorious manager, is entitled to sleep very well tonight, despite 'losing two points' (if that's how you want to look at it). Playing a 4-3-3 was a good idea, plenty of attacking possibilities, bringing the fight to the 'enemy' rather than stagnating at the back. Again, I only saw a couple of highlights from the first half so I'm no expert (as if I would be anyway...), but it seemed to be paying plenty of dividends. Since Arsenal started scoring though, for a while it didn't look like they would stop. Walcott, after his goal, seemed like a man possessed, I have a few brown stains on these pants of mine. Rogers saw this, and introduced another defender onto the pitch. It was great in the sense Arsenal didn't score again, but you could tell from that point on that our attack suffered slightly. Suarez and Henderson got caught in 'pass tennis' rather than going forward at one point, which was, I think, a direct result of the substitution. But then Sturridge (who was taken off) squandered a fair few chances. One of the reasons I didn't want him to come to the club was because of how he behaved today: trying ridiculous shots on his own for personal glory, rather than being less of a dong and passing it to a team-mate clearly in loads of empty space.

But that's the question. Should we have attacked and tried to get the three points, or defended a one-point profit. Personally, it doesn't matter. What I saw of the game was so compelling, I might just have been happy to lose outright. To get such a deserved result can be refreshing, no matter what it is. For once it didn't come down to bad decisions. What was ultimately great was that Liverpool fought hard at the end. It didn't work out perfectly, but what ever does? You get what you're given.

Saturday, 15 October 2011

Nice One!

Liverpool 1 - Manchester United 1

What a bloody brilliant game today! Despite a goalless first half and then a draw at the end of it, I think the overall match was great and very entertaining. We deserved to win, to be fair, and it was surprising that we didn't but, as Stevie G said post-match, to get a point from the champions of the league is a decent result.

Liverpool dominated in every aspect but, as seems to be an unfortunate trend sometimes, the scoreline. Possession, shots and more were in our favour, but still it was a 'well worked' (and not at all jammy) header from United's Javier Hernandez that denied us our rightful three points. You could argue that Steven Gerrard's free-kick goal was a bit soft, but all I can say is that if you can't get the basics of a wall right (i.e. stick together so you actually block the ball from the keeper), then you don't deserve to have won the Premier League... The way we continue to be treated by referees is, as usual, disappointing but (after the mention of two or three hand-ball decisions being ignored in the box, our goal kick being given as their corner - which they scored from - and a missing yellow card) the less said about that the better!

I think Stevie G deserved man of the match, but Luis Suarez was in with a good shout again. He seems tireless and nearly found the back of the net numerous times. He has such a natural talent, I just hope he realises that and doesn't beat himself up that he hasn't scored. I feel so giddy! The heartbeat of LFC back for ninety minutes, scoring his first goal of the season against the old enemy was simply amazing. The usually underrated Dirk Kuyt had a fine chance too, and the fact he didn't score is more a credit to United's keeper De Gea than it is a discredit to Liverpool.

Keep it up lads, YNWA!

P.S. A long overdue shout out to Matt, hope your own Merseyside team is inspiring you as much as mine is!

Sunday, 6 March 2011

Dutch Day Afternoon


Liverpool: 3, Manchester United: 1.

What. An. AWESOME. Match. I knew all along that our last game against West Ham (which saw today's score reversed in their favour) was just the calm before the storm, and that we'd win today. United were without a couple of their regulars, yeah, but they really didn't have anything to offer. Even with the ref helping them out with little decisions and penalizations (that's a word now!), they just couldn't muster anything troublesome.

That's not to dis United, though, it's just a comment. Of course they had decent opportunities, the most scary one being Berbatov's post-hitter, but they were simply out-classed. And what class! Dirk Kuyt with his first LFC hat-trick - well deserved due to his underrated abilities - Gerrard nearly netting a couple himself, Suarez 'lending a hand' in all three goals and nearly scoring besides, Andy Carroll's not unpromising debut, a compact defensive display, passes sticking a lot better... So much praise, so much to congratulate them on! A joy to watch, thanks Liverpool :-)